Hello 2012

Well, it's the first day of 2012 and the first thing I need to tell myself is to blog more...

Last night, instead of having a party or going to a party to play drinking games, I went to church. I'd say that was a pretty good way to end 2011. Instead of having a regular church service like most Saturday nights, Pine Hills Church decided to hold an open house for people to come and go and take communion. Before we did that we were given a program that explained more about the process and some things to think about. One thing to do was to reflect on 2011 and some significant moments. Why 2010 was an amazing year for Justin and I because of our engagement and marriage, 2011 was a continuation of good things. The thing that stands out most to me is that Justin and I were baptized together. Not only did we get to stand in front of our church and friends, but our whole family came to support u in that. And what makes it even more exciting for me is that Justin got to help baptize me. What a special moment for us.

We also became official members of PHC this year. We have attended church there for years, we just got so comfortable that we forgot to take that next step. PHC really feels like home for us so it was a great decision for us.

I think those two things were such a great step for us as Christians. We were brought together with a great group of people through a bible study this year too. Even after attending church for so long Justin and I didn't really know more than a handful of younger people. Thankfully we got to meet a lot of great people throughout that and get to call all those people friends.

From there we broke off into a smaller sort of "life together" group. I know that these people were brought into our life for a reason. It's so amazing what we all have in common together and the amazing things we bring out of each other. We have so much fun and can laugh with each other yet we can turn around, open a bible and truly talk about God and our walk with him. It's great to have that sort of connection with people. I really consider these people to be my best friends. I've know them for such a short time, but feel so connected to them all.

In September PHC did a series where we needed to address our "next steps". It was such an eye opening series for Justin and I. When our pastor presented the challenge to the congregation I think we put little thought into it at first. Thankfully Nirup had asked Justin and I to go on stage with others during the service to confess our "next steps" to the congregation. It really put us on the spot and made us really dig and find what we needed to do next as Christians. I'm happy to say Justin and I are still following through with those steps and are growing as Christians every day.

I'm so glad and proud of Justin and I in where we are in our walk with God and the steps we're taking as individuals and as a couple to build a base to our small family. I know someday there will be more to this family and I really want to be able to set a good example to the children that we hope to have someday.

So, in starting 2011 I made the resolution to get a new job. In July I quit my miserable job at Kroger with absolutely nothing lined up. It was probably one of the scariest things I've done. I haven't been jobless since I was 16. It was taking a toll on my mental and physical health as well as on my relationship with Justin and my walk with God. I will never regret my decision. I miss some of the people, some of the job, and some of what I was doing. But I left for a reason. I'm so grateful for my new job and the wonderful people I work with. I had truly lost faith in people, I think. I forgot that there are nice people out there who will do nice things for you and who aren't just out there for themselves. I came to Fort Wayne in 2006 and transferred from my old store. I liked the people and the environment I worked in. The people in the store in general were a bit weird, yes. But the pharmacist I worked for was and still is one of the most amazingly generous people I have ever met. So for five solid years after being in Fort Wayne I had only come across a handful of people who were anywhere near normal. It just became the norm for me to expect the worst from people. I just realize that something somewhere is wrong in that place and it's got to be squished out for people to turn around, be able to do their jobs well and treat people how they are supposed to be treated.

So, back to where I started. My 2011 resolution came true. I haven't quite narrowed down my resolution for 2012 but I'm excited to see what it holds in store for me and Justin. Happy New Year!

A Little of This, A Little of That...

I sort of feel like there is a world of difference from when I first started "blogging" (if you can call it that) to now. I currently have a new job. I quit my job at Kroger towards the end of July. I liked my duties there. I feel like I was really good at what I did and got along with the customers and the "normal" employees really well. Unfortunately one can only take so much stress. Between the over management of me by a certain crazy person and then the complete under management of the whole rest of the staff in the pharmacy I had to get out of there. I told myself I was spoiled with the cooperation of scheduling and that I made decent money. Who was I kidding? I had horrible hours, worked through way too many important things in my life... nights, weekends, holidays, etc. I came home in tears way too many times. I found myself being short and angry with everyone there, including the ones I had good relationships with. I was angry, tired, and unhappy.  So without a job lined up, I quit my job. It was scary yet so releasing at the same time. I got set up with a job placement company and within two weeks had a new job. Those two weeks were just the vacation I needed. Unfortunately that job ending up being a bad fit so after another few weeks with nothing, I finally got placed at the Better Business Bureau. I'm enjoying my time there. I get along with everyone there. Everyone seems so nice. It's nice to feel happy again and not so angry. I don't dread going into work every morning. So on that note... I did work today and I am entertaining a houseful of people tomorrow so I need to get off this couch and get cleaning. And maybe a bit of Pinteresting... my new obsession.

Food Revolution

so i've been addicted to jamie oliver's food revolution since i first watched it last season. this season i'm still loving it. i highly suggest anyone to watch it! it's disgusting learning the true facts about school lunches and processed food in general. i have always, and still do unfortunately, proclaim that i loved school lunches growing up. ever since day one i remember loving the food. my mom didn't have chocolate milk on hand like the school did and we didn't have cookies with every meal. i mean, who wouldn't like that? i loved school pizza, burritos, ravioli, sandwiches, etc, etc... but i also remember always liking vegetables growing up. at a very young age i remember picking fresh asparagus on the side of the road with my baby sitter and being so excited to go back and eat it. that's a great example for why fresh food is good for children. they learn that if they can grow it, they can pick it and cook it themselves. what's so sad is that last season on jamie oliver he went into a classroom and the kids couldn't identify fruits and vegetables. didn't we learn that in kindergarten?! i remember very vividly learning a new fruit/vegetable every week and tasting it. maybe some schools just don't do that whether it be for lack of interest or funding. i guess that's why it's so important to feed your kids good food. now i know produce from the store is expensive. trust me, i know. the first place you hit in the store is the produce and when i'm done in that section i walk away with a good 1/3 to 1/4 of the cart being just produce and knowing that that's what's gonna make up about half of the cost of my bill! but it's worth it. it's sad that going through a drive-thru fast food place and hitting their value menu for burgers and fries is the cheapest and most convenient way for people to feed their kids. i don't know how people can be giving their children pop, candy and fast food at such a young age. the toxins in that food is what's causing obesity, sickness, and probably (just an outsiders view) why the rate of child mental disability rates are rising. so back to school lunches... yes, i enjoyed the crap i ate at school. some people think i'm crazy. but, on pizza day they always served corn. yes corn and pizza. i'm still puzzled by that. it may not have been the freshest corn, but i always ate it. i always ate the veggies on the lunch line. once i hit high school, we were blessed with the option of salad bar. i can tell you i probably hit the salad bar lunch line as often as i hit the regular line.

so now, as a conscious adult, i feel for the most part i make pretty good decisions when it comes to the food i eat. i think every now and then i like to eat junk just like the next person, but i think i've been blessed with fairly good genes and a passion for sweating at the gym... even though i enjoy my tv time on the couch! (<-- this is where the good genes come into play) i enjoy being in the kitchen and trying new recipes. i love thinking that anything with regular flour can be better with whole wheat flour. and that anything that comes frozen or in a box will taste much better and make me feel better knowing i made it from scratch. i like knowing that i can control my sugar intake. (i can picture my family laughing at me right now since they all know i grew up drinking coffee in my sippy cup and drank this coffee with spoonful after spoonful of sugar until i was about 19 or 20... not always in that sippy cup haha) i like knowing the ingredients going into my food, not just reading it on the side of a box. i love fruits and veggies and love, love, love salads! i hope we're able to pass this thought onto our children someday. we never have pop in this house and we absolutely love milk and water. don't get me wrong, it's good to treat yourself every now and then, but i think i'd want to give my growing children only the best foods to help them grow mentally and physically. 

The Married Life

i'm not quite sure where the time has gone. it's been just over eleven months since justin proposed. and here we are, january of 2011 and we're married. everyone keeps asking, "how's married life?" i know it's different, but it all just feels the same. i'm just happy. i've got a bit of the blues from no longer planning a wedding, but i hear that's normal. there was so much stress, craziness and excitment in the last year. i guess i should just enjoy the road ahead of me.

with it being winter, i think justin and i are getting a bit of cabin fever. i'll catch myself in any room thinking, "what could i do to change this room?" this time of year, hgtv seems to be on the tv more for us so i've always got these crazy ideas. i hope our new budgeting will work and we can slowly start to make some changes to this house. i keep telling justin we need to sit and make a video to send to the new hgtv'd show so we can get our dream patio! we plan on re-doing that this spring. i've got my fingers crossed that the big semi-truck will show up in front of our house so we can use our deck money on new floors for the kitchen/mudroom/bathroom. :) something good has to happen to us right? not that we haven't had good in our lives, i just think we're still a little bitter from the vacation and clark getting sick thing during the wedding...

which reminds me, we still are waiting on our insurance money. it seems to be a battle. the travel agent said she sent all the paperwork in just for them to turn around and say something wasn't right. so, we're behind another six weeks i guess. people ask, "when are you going to go on your honeymoon?" good question. we can't book until we get that money back. we spent quite a chunk of change on that vacation and don't just have that money sitting around. so we have to get it back before we can book again. but thank God we decided to go through a travel agent so we're getting all this help and we were smart enough to actually get insurance.

i'm extremely bored tonight. i can only watch so much tv before i go insane. i need to read. i need to find books that hold my interest. i don't want to keep reading twilight over and over until i'm sick of it. i attempted to re-read them but it took too long the second time through so i gave up. i'll give it a while before i pick them up again. maybe i'll want to read them as quickly as i did the first time again. i still say those were two of the best weeks of my life reading those books. i've never held such interest in books before. i'm on the search for the next great read! (not that edward could be replaced (; )

so, for a quick catch up, yes my little clarky is doing just fine. he's as feisty as ever. so feisty i'm thinking of getting a trainer to come to the house. i'm tired of getting attacked everytime i wear slippers. by the time winter is over and he's used to them he'll just get mad at me for switching over to flip flops and there's another fight with him. it's a constant battle with this dog. my grandma told me, "i think you should just get rid of that dog." i said, "i think i'm a little too attached at this point, grandma." she says, "no, you'd get over it." haha that coming from a lady who's not too fond of dogs. she loved butch when he was old and moved about as fast as her, and bruno grew on her when he got older and calm as well. clark and buster (mom's dog) are just a little too crazy for her. they're too crazy for me too when they are together. but hey, they're brothers. what else would you expect? my favorite thing to do is wake up in the morning, put on my coffee, and grab a spot on the couch under a blanket with clark. he may be viscious and crazy when people are around and when he's awake and hyper. but my cuddle time with him is the best, and i wouldn't trade it for the world. he's my baby.

speaking of baby, my brother's wife, kara, is due in a month. february 17th to be exact. grandma would be tickled pink if they had the baby that day seeing as how it's her birthday. it will be another little girl for them. i sometimes forget she's pregnant because it's gone so quick. i guess we've had a lot on our plate this last year though. justin's sister rosena is also pregnant. she had her first appointment today so i think she's still somewhere in that first trimester. i'm excited to have more nieces or possible another nephew around soon.

well, i hope to update this more often. i've always got so many thoughts, and this is a good way to get it out. i hope to have some beautiful wedding pics posted soon as well!

Oh Monday...

my monday has actually been pretty good. i slept in a bit... til after 8! i needed it. i had a full week last week. but i had a quick breakfast and headed to the Y. oh how i love working out. i feel so much better about myself already. not sure how i thought i could get motivated at home without the workout equipment. so anyway, i'll be back at it tomorrow. justin and i have really agreed to push eachother and make sure we're on the right track. he's started the P90X workout. so far, he really like its. i hope he sticks with it cuz i know he's happy working out again.

so when i got home from the y i played with clark, made lunch, and did my chore for the day. yes folks, justin and i are now 10 again and we are doing chores. our lives seem to be so busy from day to day things that we haven't been the best at keeping up with housework. justin will find anything he can to be working outside that i haven't seem him do more than laundry or dishes in months. which i shouldn't complain, but i like his help with other things. so we're taking a room a day to completely clean top to bottom. hopefully once we get through each room we'll be able to keep up with it a little easier. so i hear him now, whistling away while he cleans the spare bedroom. which by the way, i think he chose that room today cuz it was already the cleanest room in the house. but again, not complaining...

work wasn't bad today. wait, what? monday? kroger? slow pharmacist? yes, i survived. i'm tellin ya, it's those endorphines from working out. and i only swore a couple times today. haha pretty good considering. justin and i have gotten better at cleaning up our foul mouths. my work situation always seems so up and down. i hate kroger... but i seem to be afraid of change. i got offered a job at the fort wayn country club and they had me work saturday night. i was super excited until it became saturday and i worked 10-3 at kroger then had to be there at 6:30. i really wasn't up for working. i went into it with a bad attitude. i almost had a panick attack pulling up. it was horrible. i worked til 12:30, which by the way people i usually am in bed by 10. sad, i know. but anyway, i served drinks, standing in one spot, for five hours to a bunch of high schoolers. ugh... how i hate food service! i was hoping to go into this job with a cool like, golf course job or something. it's not gonna last. i know i'm being picky... maybe too picky. but what can i say, as much as i hate kroger, i'm spoiled with a pretty dang good schedule and good pay. we'll see where the summer takes me. there's gotta be a dream job out there right?

so, i need to get some wedding stuff done. it's 20 til 8 which means at 9 justin will start whining about it being 9 and him not having showered yet. which then the house will be quiet and maybe i can get a little done before i hit the bed with edward cullen. yes, my vampire boyfriend who my fiance totally knows about but hates. yes, i'm 10.

Wedding thoughts

so the more that i get going into this wedding planning stuff, the more i think to myself, who made up all these "rules"? who decided proper etiquette on what to do and not to do concerning my guests. yes, i'm inviting you to this "party" so to speak... so shouldn't my guests just be happy with what i'm providing and not pick at every detail and not criticize that i did something "wrong"? i mean, this day is foremost about justin and i. i'm sure when we stand before God to say our vows, he's not concerned on whether or not my guests will be provided with hotel blocks, wedding favors and great food. as much as i love tradition and planning a wedding, i have become annoyed with the small things. i'm trying my best to go along with it all and be traditional, but i'm trying to stand out and make this event, this union, unique. after all, why should my declaration of love to justin be the same as the last person standing in the same altar or reception hall?

so now that's off my chest... yes, i am having fun with it all. i'm not stressed yet, but i feel like i don't know where to go right now. i have my big things done, so now it's all the small details i need to get put together. after all, i am getting married in less than six months!

we've been doing a lot of renovating on the exterior of the house. i can't wait to have this house look as great on the outside as i think it looks on the inside. as for now, clark is a happy little guy who gets to run the whole backyard now because of the new fence. thank goodness he's finally getting that energy put to good use!

do i have a blog? i've been completely consumed with life. i got engaged, which i don't even think i've blogged about. i have been super busy with all that on my mind...
lots going on this week... justin's grandpa passed away so we've been dealing with that this week. i think everyone's glad he's not in pain with his bone cancer anymore, but sad he's gone. he seemed to be the rock of this family, so lots of prayers for them...
on that note, we've been driving quite a bit. i was in howe on sunday for rosena's (justin's sister) wedding assembly line. we did her invites, centerpieces and favors. that's a lot of crafty for one day! so we drove back up on monday when his grandpa was flown to kalamazoo... that made for a long day. we'll be back up today for the viewings, then sunday i'll be back in sturgis once more for easter. my poor car :(
i hope to get back on here soon to update all the crazy wedding stuff i have going on. as for anyone who reads this, enjoy the gorgeous weather. sounds like we'll be having a record setting day in store... 80 degrees!